JOKES
��� Two women riding
����������� Two Old Ladies
������������������� The Big Bad Wolf
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Ellen Degeneres virus.........Your IBM suddenly
claims it's a MAC
Monica Lewinsky virus.........Sucks all the memory out of your computer
Titanic virus.................Makes your whole computer go down
Disney virus..................Everything in the computer goes Goofy
Mike Tyson virus..............Quits after one byte
Prozac virus..................Screws up your RAM but your processor doesn't care
Sharon Stone virus............Makes a huge initial impact, then you forget it's there.
Lorena Bobbit virus...........Turns your hard disk into a floppy
Tim Allen virus...............Appears helpful, only to destroy your hard drive upon
contact
Woody Allen virus.............Bypasses the motherboard and turns on a daughter card
Saddam Hussein virus..........Won't let Jews into any of their programs
Tonya Harding virus...........Turns your BAT files into lethal weapons
George Michael's virus.........Runs its course, occasionally releasing excess data buildup
Joey Buttafuoco virus.........Only attacks minor files
X-files virus.................All your Icons start shape shifting
Spice Girl virus..............Has no real function, but makes a pretty desktop
Ronald Reagan virus...........Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored
Dr. Jack Kevorkian virus......Searches your hard drive for old files and deletes them
Oprah Winfrey virus...........Your 200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB, and then
slowly expands to 300MB
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus...Terminates and stays resident. But it will be back
Two women went mountain bike riding one day. One of them was admiring the scenery and said to her friend,� "...You know, I have never come this way before!" Then her friend replied, "...Me either, it must be the bumpy track!"
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Two old ladies were sitting at a park bench when a man came past and flashed them. One of the ladies had a stroke, the other one couldn't reach.
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The big bad wolf hurried through the woods before Little Red Riding Hood could get to her granny's house. He burst into the cottage and said, "OK granny, out you get, I'm going to lock you in the wardrobe." But granny pulled out a shot gun from under her blanket with one hand and lifted her nightie with the other hand and said, " Oh no you don't Mr Wolf, you do like the story says!"
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